I just want to point out that when talking with children about safety, sometimes "family" is not always the correct safe word to use. Some children have supervised visitation with a parent. I think it should be noted that not all "family" is safe either. It isn't always strangers that we have to protect our children from.
Thank you.

I don't agree that children should be rude to every adult and we will stand behind them. As adults we think we know best and what we do with and for our child is right. It's not till it's too late that we realize something went wrong with what we thought was right.
To treat every grown adult rude is wrong
and does not hold a healthy future for any of us.

Todays appearance on the Today show made me so mad I wanted to scream. NBC should be helping to find Mattie, not having someone on the show to make the public think that they were to blame, because they were 50 feet away. Some homes are so large that the bedrooms are farther than 50 feet away, are you going to go on TV and blame them for having a large home if someone takes their child? Your comments were so wrong todat, That family is feeling enough grief, and blaming themselves enough without you going on air and making it worse. If you have nothing to help in the finding of Mattie you should keep your mouth shut!!! I have never been so mad as I am now. NBC was also contacted on your blame on their show.

I couldn't even read the article. I have my own - unpublished. i DID THE EXTREMES to protect several children at a private school, but C.P.S. Spokane County, didn't even recognize a slight risk, or guide the father to intervention. The pedophile, not even alleged, is on a deferred program meaning; if he doesn't get caught again...no one will believe these children are at risk; No record of his past behavior towards children. CPS - cause and affect. That was one year ago. The signs are worse now. Another child entering the home, sad to say a female. It is hard to watch our system furthur victimize these INNOCENT victims because of a personal problem with the "advocate". Yes I have reported to much truth in the past, and when it became personal, they, CPS Spokane County, used my grandchildren to retailiate against me for stating the truth as I saw it!I want action!!! NO more words. They don't stop the behaviors!Yes even GOOD people get angry!@#$%^&*()!!!

We need to keep watch on our children, but we also need to recognize that we can't be with them every waking moment. I think it is okay to prepare children. They need to be on their guard when we can't be there to protect them. I don't advocate being RUDE, but I do advocate assertiveness. There is a difference and it can be taught. I'm also a big advocate of self defense classes. Children gain a means of protecting themselves while also gaining a bit of confidence.

We certainly need to follow your guidelines on alerting without alarming our children.

Kids are so literal, however, that it would be helpful if you clarified that being rude is only warranted when the adult is acting inappropriately. When some children hear that you'd rather they be rude to 100 people, they'll take it as a license to be indiscriminately rude. There are far too many examples of that on television already.

Television executives need to review their programming to see if they are in any way whatsoever contributing to this child abuse, asking themselves:

* Will this segment lead children to believe that casual sex (or touching) with an acquaintance is OK?

* Will this segment cause kids (and predators) to think that it's now OK to cross conventional boundaries?

* Is this content too sexual for this time of day?

* Will this segment present drinking as an innocuous activity, making kids more receptive to the alcohol offered during the predator's grooming process?

Here we look at predators as if they are only older, 30-40 yr old men. What about older kids, babysitters, teenage siblings? No all abuse is adult-child interaction. Kids need to know where there is a line in playing with outher kids, and siblings. They also need to be able to talk to other people their own age about these things, so be able to say "Hey, I don't think that's good. I think you should stop."

As well, we need to be more mindful of sexualizing our own childre, or allowing them to be sexualized. Clothing that we may think is cool, and a little girl thinks is "just like my sister", may, to a pedophile, constitute "flirty" clothes, which tell them that the child understands what they do to the predator. Think more carefully before putting a 10 year old in a miniskirt, knee-high boots and a midriff-showing top at the mall. It isn't cute, it's dangerous

My daughter was stalked at age 2 and 1/2 by a predator in a store. She was potty training at the time and I noticed this man staring at her and always seeming to be close to us as we came and went. It creeped me out. He followed us to another store and did the same thing. He even commented on how pretty our daughter was. All of my senses were tingling. We called the police on him and gave them his license plate. The plate did not match the vehicle (that was suspect) but the saddest thing was what the cops told me and I quote, "A man can say anything he wants to your child as long as he doesn't touch her." Since when is it appropriate for a grown man to talk sex talk and dirty to a child and not be punished for it. Makes me want to be a vigilante now that I am a parent. We have a right to defend our children from voilence in all forms, even language.

I feel sorry for the children of today. In today's world both parents have to work as well as grandparents so there are very few people available to watch over the children. It really takes a village to raise children. We need as many eyes on our children as possible. I worry about my grandchildren all the time because when I grew up we had a large extended family around. Now, the children are at the mercy of strangers as caregivers. To me, it only increases the risk and contributes to more parental anxiety. I pray that those parents find their little girl soon. They are in my prayers.

I don't want my kids to be rude to other people, but, if they cannot see me I have explained to my 10 yr old girl and 7 yr old boy since they were old enough to understand that screaming, scratching, biting or kicking are acceptable if they feel uneasy about another person's behavior. I prefer "rudeness" to the alternative any day!

I read that the parents suspect that their daughter was taken for the child sex trade. This is a big problem, in the US as well as abroad, but you don't hear much about it. We need someone big, like Oprah, to get behind this and stop it. I heard Atlanta was the worst city for this in the US. Men are such disgusting pigs - I will never get married again because they are all perverts deep down inside. I never let my kids out of my sight and I have taught them to fight with every bit of strength they have if anyone tries to do anything to them. It's sad that things have to be this way but morals have disappeared. I have even become an atheist because this disgusting behavior is being perpetrated by members of the clergy, too! What a bunch of fools, to think that there could possibly be an imaginary, magical being that affects our world. If that were true, little Madeleine would be safe and sound. For those of you who say it was "the devil", you all are fools too. Get a grip on reality - you are on your own!

1. Dee, get a life, and a grip. Not all men are the Devil, grow up.
2. No, lets not teach our kids to be rude, I would rather someone take them, than they be rude, God forbid!
3.I teach Martial Arts to kids, and let me tell all of you something, If a 6' 250 lb man grabs that kid, they are usually in big trouble, can they really fend a grown man or WOMAN off? In most case's no
4.Teach your children to trust noone, I know it sounds harsh etc,etc. But most attacks are done by people they are familiar with. So yes, teach them to be strong, and to speak up about how they really feel. Teach them to not respect their elders, until it is fully earned.
5. I am a survivor, as well as my siblings, I have seen what sexual molestation can do, and my sister is in her late 40's and still has problems coping from the attacks from her very early teens.
6. I have learned to teach my children to make it very clear anyone touches them,or talks trash to them, they will tell me, or someone immediately!
7. Get a backbone PARENTS

Hello-

Does anyone else see a problem here? Let's stop beating each other up and stop waiting for Oprah to save the world and stand up together! It would be amazing what we could do if we ALL stood together and say we have had enough! If we could go back to the day where you knew your neighbors and watched out for each other! If we stopped being so angry and hateful towards each other, WHERE WOULD WE BE???? Just a thought.

Thanks for all the advice to better help protect my children. I would like to see every last one of these sick human beings who harm a child erased from Earth.

In this country, these jerks can get away with crap. I tell my grandchild everything about these preditors. We even discuss this subject and practice what some jerk would pull. What to look out for and do not be afraid to tell no matter what he or she threatens trying to scare you, but afraid of adults. Be rude and get away from the sickos. Scream and yell loud to get attention. Stay away from places that are isolated. I explain to her what to look for in a creep, whether it be friend, foe or even a family member. Tell what you sense and feel about this person to your parents. If they don't listen, and they better, then see me. The computor situation, is a must for your child to know about. No fairy tales. I come from a tough Italian family. I don't mix words. I will go on discussing this with my grandchild, even into her late teens on how to spot a creep. There is a way to tell. These days you have to be straight with kids. They have to know. We lack tougher laws.
It's gotten out of hand.

Monday Jan 12, 2004 my daughter was molested when she was 15 years old, by someone that we both trusted. He was my husband, her stepfather. We had been divorced for a year. They were close, she called him dad. He bought her things that I would not let her have, to get her on his side. He would then undermind my discipline, by telling my daughter that I was crazy and unreasonable. He would say this in front of her, to me. This was gaining her trust. I tried to tell my daughter that what he was doing was not right. He was trying to put a wedge between us. Of course, she was a teenager and did not listen to me. She trusted him. One night they went to dinner. After dinner, he took her to his house to watch a movie. He had a beer. He turned off the lights, she went to sleep on the couch. She awoke to his hands on her, under her clothing, violating her. She was scared to death and pretended to be asleep. The psychiatrist said it was a defense mechanism. Play opossum and he'll go away. She was scared to death.

Continued...that night is the worst of my life. The night my daughter came home from her my ex-husbands house. The night she cried and told me what he had done. I will never forget the words. I will never forget the fear she had. DO NOT believe that your children are safe with anyone. Anyone can hurt your child. There were many signs that I did not recognize until after the fact. He stayed up late at night, after I went to bed. He watched porn. He would tell me that he could hear my daughter talking to herself while she slept. He could not of heard her, unless he was in her room. When she had her bath, he made her leave the door open, he said because he wanted to hear if she splashed water on the floor. Now I know that he wanted to see her when she stood up from the tub in the mirror. He sat on the couch, in the perfect position, every night. He did not allow her to bathe in my garden tub in my bathroom. She found a photo on his digital camera that he taken of her butt, zoomed in. Guard them all!

Part III...Let me tell you that the guilt I feel for bringing this person into our lives, is unsurmountable. The families of the children that my daughter grew up with, turned against her. They believed him, because they were all drinking buddies. He has them all fooled. My daughter called my that night, before she left his house, to let me know that they were leaving. She told me when she got home that she called me, so that I would know to expect her soon. She was afraid that he would kill her on the way home. Hear what I am saying. My daughter feared for her life that night. She was afraid she was going to die. Imagine for one moment how your child would feel. Now imagine hearing those words from your child. Your children are your responsibility. God has entrusted them to you. I let my daughter down. I will live with this for the rest of my life. My ex told me in an email that he was only human. What lies are you being told? Do not ignore the signs. Please.

I have a question thats haunted me for years, when I was a teen I was asked by an uncle to watch their 2 daughters, the girl who had been adopted and was around 17 usually watched them had been asked to leave the home, she had molested their 3 yr old daughter very recently, and they had plans to attend a function, when they came home from this they thought I was asleep and talked about how she had done this to their Daughter. 20 years later, my mother called me and commented that their daughter who had been molested was seeing a therapist and the therapist was inquiring as to weather it was possible she had been molested, my cousin was asking my mom if there was ever news of this happening to her, by this time of course she was an adult, I answered her question through my mother, and told of what I had overheard. My Uncle or Aunt it appeared never told her about being molested, guess he thought it was best to not share it with her, and I guess hoped she would just forget about it? thats my question,,would she?

May I suggest a mock trial or a "try catch scenario?" They always seem to work more effectively as deterrents.

Bruce