Dr. Saltz, Thank you for talking about this important issue. Far too many M.D.s are reticent to either give advice to parents or to talk with the preteen or teenager directly.

I would add to your advice: there are parents who just don't feel comfortable talking about sex or sexuality with their children, and so they do not do it. Ultimately, that's okay, as long as they establish another trusted adult who will reach out to their child and have those sex and sexuality conversations with them - their doctor, an aunt or uncle, a minister, a teacher, or another adult family friend. Of course that individual must be chosen with the utmost care and attention. Particularly important is will they address the topic appropriately and in-line with the parents' beliefs and does the child trust and feel comfortable talking about such personal matters with the chosen adult?

I discuss these issues, and many more on my blog about adolescent sexuality: http://www.adolescentsexualitytoday.blogspot.com.

Karen Rayne, Ph.D.

I am a grandmother who has a granddaughter that has lived with us and this is perfect for us. She is 11 and is starting to ask several questions. I am going out and get this right away! THANK YOU!

I think it's a great idea to help explain everything that a child would understand and on there level I would go out and buy this book just for that my mom had passed when I was 10 so when it came time for me to learn about sex and everything that goes with it my dad being backward and they didn't talk about things like that I heard from hear say so I want my child to have the right information

I am the mother of an 11 year old daughter that just started middle school. I know she will be asking these questions soon. I was wondering how to answer them in an informative and unbiased way, and this book will help me do that. Thank you to Dr. Gail!

Samantha Jones-Caldarelli

I commend Dr. Saltz for writing this book. Speaking to our kids about sex will not be comfortable no matter what format we use. This book will take his eyes off me and onto the book so my discomfort may not show as much. If you are not comfortable with the book, don't buy it. But for those of us who need help it sounds great!

I am definitely a supporter of having these talks and I have read Dr. Gail's book to my son. I don't want him thinking girls have a "flower" as some parents I know tell their kids. My son is 7 and I can always tell that he appreciates me sharing information with him. I do however tell him NOT to share this with the other kids because we have to be respectful of every parent's beliefs on how to bring up their children. I know that because I am open with my son, he feels comfortable coming to me when he has doubts. Hopefully this will continue into his adolescence.

When my 6-year old son (he is now 19) came home with sex mis-information, my husband and I decided to clear thing up then. Yes, he still believed in Santa Claus, which was strange, but we realized it was a good age to start the talk with all the kids -- simple but important information. By 10 or 11 they had the basic facts and still asked questions. By 13 they (two sons and a daughter) had STOPPED asking questions for the most part, but by that age had a good grasp on facts, morals and our beliefs. Having this type of conversation early, made other conversations about drugs, alcohol, academic honesty easy to broach, as they knew we could tackle the tough question. We also had "safe times" for these conversations where we had promised they could talk about various activities with no questions/no punishments (i.e. have you tried alcohol/cigarettes??) when the answer was "yes" (and it has been) we discussed the "whys" of trying, how to say no to friends etc. Sex discussions are a small part of a larger issue.

There's good and bad explicit. Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy is bad explicit, i.e. a graphic sexual description that too many pre-teens are watching these days. Gail's book is good explicit, i.e. clear and detailed. Irony is that your anchor today was blushing about biological body parts and their functions, and yet probably goes home and watches Housewives and Anatomy without thinking twice about the hypersexual messages being sent through her TV. Gail, I will seek out your book for my 11 year old son. Thank you. Jody Johnson, Boyne City, Michigan

What a great book! I work with teen parents and am amazed at the number of them who really do NOT know how they got pregnant. I think it's every parent's responsiblity to teach his/her child how male and female bodies work. This is not a comfortable topic but it has to be done for health and personal/moral reasons.
Another great resource can be found at local Planned Parenthood. They have nice 'kits' to help parents discuss this challenging subject. Those who are right to life need to remember that if an unwanted pregnancy never occurs a termination doesn't either!!! PREVENTION PREVENTION PREVENTION You can't prevent what you don't know about.
The correct information is also a protection if your child has someone be inappropriate to them. The child who uses correct terminology is a much better witness than one using 'cutesy' terms.
Protect your child with the correct information. Children who are given honest information and shown honesty to be important and valued learn to be honest.
Thank you Dr. Gail!!

Dr.Gail, What a great idea! One thing you did not mention for parents, If it makes them uncomfortable. Read the book or just a talk about sex is easier if they could read it a place where they don't have to be eye to eye with their child. At the beach,on a porch, or a back yard etc. to make both partys comfortable. My husband had the talk with our son before he entered Jr. High school (10yrs. old) on his sisters balcony faceing the ocean.They were able to talk honestly to one another. When my husband thought he was finished and asked if our son had anymore questions,uor son asked how do lesbians get pregnent? Another book maybe?! 5 stars to you!! Nancy nannygoatpro@aug.com

Dr Saltz
I am disappointed, no disgusted with your latest venture. I really can't imagine that a 10 year old or younger, or older for that matter, has the capacity to comprehend what you are trying to do. At the very least, it can only arouse their curiosity and experimental senses, which at this time in their lives is much more highly developed than their sexual sensitivity. I can't recall as a child, ever having more than a passing curiosity about how a baby is made; any more than I had a curiosity about God. I first learned about the clitoris after about my third or fourth sexual experience...and I learned about it from my partner, from her reactions and responses...and I didn't know it was called a clitoris.. and it didn't matter. And it sure was a hell of a lot better than reading it in a book. The experience and natural evolvement, made sex, and "making love", a warm, exciting and pleasurable time. Yes, too much knowledge can be a dangerous thing.

Dr. Saltz- Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have a ten year old daughter. She is well into puberty and I recently decided it was time to let her know "the truth". But... how in the world am I going to tell her? I have gone over the conversation in my head and once I get to the mechanics of intercourse...ohhhh how am I going to do this? I was about the same age when I asked my mother straight out. She sat across the table from me and told me everything.I decided right then that I was not going to do that ... ever. Clearly I have since changed my mind, as my mom said I would. She was very brave and I was the third child she had the talk with. (two older brothers) I am grateful to have this book to guide this very difficult conversation. It's a big step, one of the moments in life most people remember very well. This right of passage for my daughter will include me and she will know she can come to me in the future with any questions she may have.

Dr. Saltz- Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have a ten year old daughter. She is well into puberty and I recently decided it was time to let her know "the truth". But... how in the world am I going to tell her? I have gone over the conversation in my head and once I get to the mechanics of intercourse...ohhhh how am I going to do this? I was about the same age when I asked my mother straight out. She sat across the table from me and told me everything.I decided right then that I was not going to do that ... ever. Clearly I have since changed my mind, as my mom said I would. She was very brave and I was the third child she had the talk with. (two older brothers) I am grateful to have this book to guide this very difficult conversation. It's a big step, one of the moments in life most people remember very well. This right of passage for my daughter will include me and she will know she can come to me in the future with any questions she may have.

Oh, and by the way, forgot to mention. We raised 6 children, no problem, they are all great and well adjusted, and have given us 17 grandchildren.

Thumbs up to Dr. Saltz. Honesty is the best way to talk to your kids. Also, naming body parts correctly, and identifying them correctly. How many people have been using the wrong term since they saw Oprah saying that "her va-jay-jay was paining"? Se was probably referring to the vulva and couldn't or wouldn't say the correct term on tv.
Thank you, Dr. Saltz!

I APPLAUD you!!

Thank you

I thought your reading (about your book Changing you) on on the air was done in a very respectful and educated manner.
I will be purchasing the book today, Thanks!

Beatrice Rodriguez
Katy, TX

THANK YOU! I can't wait to buy your book! I don't understand why parents are afraid to use correct terms for their kids bodies...my four year old got into an argument with another boy at preschool over whether it was a penis or a wee wee. I am so glad I am teaching proper terms at home! I am praying it will make an easier transition into the sexual intercourse talk! Thank you again!

I think it is great to have a book out that helps parents to talk to their children. Some can say it is to much info but I learned from my daughter who is 19 soon to be 20 , that even though I talked to her I never told her enough because she learned things from boys at school that was so wrong that if I didn't tell her the truth about certain topics she could of got herself into trouble with so many untrue info. I have a soon to be nine year old son who is asking questions and I plan to get this book to help me explain better to my son then I did to her. It is a topic that needs to be explained right to all of our children and the parents need to tell it first. Not their friends and not the tv. And also explaining in detail of what their body parts are at a young age can also help a child to explain to you whenever there is a issue. When we are honest with our children that is when they can talk to us about almost anything, trust. Communication and love is the key to our children. Thank you.

As a mother of 2 teenage girls and a school nurse this book is past due. I taught sex education in middle school and it is amazing the lack of true facts kids are basing their decisions on. Unfortunately, many parents struggle with this topic therefore avoid it all together. Hopefully this book will assist them in educating their children. Thanks!

Kudos to you, Dr. Saltz! As a single parent, I take my role as my son's primary educator and caretaker very seriously and my 11-year-old son knows that. From what I gleaned from today's program, your book, Changing You: A Guide to Body Changes and Sexuality, demystifies the male and female body for tweens and teens in a matter-of-fact, accessible manner and in language that is not "dumbed down" or "kiddified". As a parent and an educator, I try to take advantage of every teachable moment. As far as the topic of sex is concerned, your book will provide me with an appropriate segue into a candid and private conversation with my son about it. He already has questions about what is happening to his body and trusts me to tell him the truth and to name things as they really are. Thanks again, Dr. Saltz!

Hi Dr. Saltz,

I am glad you wrote this book. I am definitely going to make it a part of my children's library. Thank you!!!

THANK YOU for the option of this kind of honesty and detail for parents who want to handle this "talk" they best way possible for THIER children!

Dr. Saltz, thank you for writing a book that helps parents explain and discuss anatomy, sex, love, and more.

Melvin Pollock, yes, we can all "look back" and believe that childhood was all sweet and innocent and simple. Girls and women are complex and thinking beings. My 8-year-old daughter knows about "periods" and what they look like and what they are for (I said it is ingredients that our bodies make each month in case we need it to make a baby, and when we don't make a baby that month, it is not needed and our bodies let it out...Dr. Saltz, do you want to write a book about periods, too?). 2 of Lauren's friends got their periods as early as last year! Melvin, perhaps you can imagine that teaching and explaining can help girls to know what is going on and to make them comfortable with the process and themselves. I also believe this can be used as a tool to remind them that their bodies are their own and to talk about what is inappropriate touching by others.

Dr. Salts, I thought your presentation this morning was excellent and the book seems like a much needed addition to out children's sex education. I was very disappointed in Natalie's very old-fashioned and dertimental attitude toward sex and sex education. I do not think that she should have been the one to do with interview on TV. Her attitude is a throwback of about 50-60 years. I hope her husband is able to educate their son--she certainly isn't going to do it.

Dear Gail,

Finally, we have a resource for our children that is honest and forthright for our children to learn the facts of lie accurately. When I was eight, my mom was pregnant and tried to explain how she got that way. I was convinced if I sat too close to a boy, I'd be pregnant. Thank you for having the courage to teach children all the facts.

Danna Demetre

Thank you for this book. We have three boys that range from 11 to 16. My husband and I struggle everyday with the younger two with how much to share vs. what they are hearing misinformation wise from friends. This will help. Thank you again!

sounds like a good tool for psrents.
just a thought, how about talking about safe sex and birth controle,(condoms, the pill, the morning after pill) what thay are sposed to protec aganst and there falure rate.

Dr. Saltz, Thank you! I agree that this is needed in our world today. Our kids need a true and accurate explanation of their bodies, sex, and love making. My husband and I just had our first baby, but we have already discussed how we will talk to our kids about their bodies and sex. We will use your books! Thanks again!

Where were you when I needed you for my now 45 year old son and my now 21 year old grandson! What I heard and saw of the "drawings" is perfect for mothers of todays children.

Dr. Saltz, THANK YOU! I was a "changing youth" with two very shy parents who were weary about sex topics. My information came from books my mother checked out of the library for me. All these books had bits and pieces of what I really wanted/needed to know. Your book seems to encompass it all. Wish I had a book like this when I was younger to help answer my questions.

I applaud Dr.Saltz and her book! I am the mother of two daughters (20 & 15). From a very early age I taught the correct terms for all of their body parts, I would no more have them call their hand their "ho-ho" than to have them call their vagina their "hoo-hoo". My oldest daughter's sitter did ask one day if I had a new car, or a "Volvo" though, as my daughter had proudly stated, "mommy has a vulva, and so do you, and so do I!". Showing we can all stand to lighten up on this topic!

I applaud Gail Saltz on her new book, and The Today Show for airing the interview. (Natalie's overstated embarrasment was unfortunate and shocking.)

My kids are 7 and 9 and it is much easier to talk about "the scary words" when they are young. You cannot wait until they are tweens/teens to introduce the language and the conversation. We started from the beginning using penis and vagina. Sometimes we giggle about it still as they are "unique" words, but at least we all are comfortable using them.

I attended a parenting meeting last year hosted by www.birdsandbeesandkids.com and learned that basically EVERYTHING should be introduced by age 9, from teaching a science standpoint to give them the foundation, then at 10 and up, you add the values portion by coaching them with your values. The foundation creates the environment to make you both comfortable enough to discuss it.

I wll definitely by the book!

I appreciate that you've provided another tool to help parents relay the facts of life.

Learning the correct terms for body parts ensures that everyone is clear when discussing medical or abuse issues.

What isn't clear is the motive of the media when they knowingly present gratuitous sexually explicit material knowing that children will be watching.

Some television personalities are professing to be advocating accurate sex education when they're actually pursuing an agenda that goes beyond that. Unlike you (who respects each parent's personal value system) these media personalities are attempting to push their own personal value system on the rest of the country (while pretending to be presenting a less aggressive agenda).

It's cut and dried that a vagina is a vagina. Literature pertaining to the vagina (which can be interpreted as sanctioning promiscuity) isn't. Some in the media profess to be teaching terms when they are in fact crusading for a PERSONAL cause.

I appreciate your approach.

Dr Gail,
What a great thing you have done...opened many parents eyes about the importance of teaching children about their bodies and how their bodies are important! Good for you and I plan on getting this book and showing it to my daughter when she is old enough to undersatnd it! Thanks Again!

I wish I had this book around when it was time to explain sexuality to my son & daughter! Hopefully it will come in handy for my son who now has 2 sons of his own.

You hit the nail on the head, openly and educationally. Thanks for a great book on a tough subject.

Thanks for you excellent presentation.As a pediatrician and grandmother, I was so glad to hear your message= please help parents know what to say with the barrage of sexual messages on TV - so much labeled sexy or "hot". . I thought it was a bit silly for the interviewer to warn parents or be embarassed. Please do this again and discuss how parents can address the endless ads for Viagra, etc. with lots of language not very appropriate for children. Thank you again.

Thank you for bringing this to the forefront again. I am a 55 year old grandmother and had a "coffee table" book when my boys were young. "Where did I come from" it was always there to read and talk about. I was a single mother with two boys and this book was a great help to me.
It's time we learn to talk to our children! Your book does that. Thank you again.

Unfortunately, the elder boy or girl who is dominant in the neighborhood is usually where the information is partially gained. Then, every other form of instruction or information becomes secondary at least, and not as exiting.

Bruce