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Surviving the Stresses of Recession
The recession is deeply affecting people. For some, it is the hard financial facts and the stress, fear, frustration and depression that it brings. Others may not be in a desperate financial situation, but they are still in a "psychological recession", meaning that they fear the recession is happening and this gives them a sense of loss of control, anxiety about what might happen to them in the future and angst that whatever is happening to others they cannot prevent happening to them.
Watch the segment from TODAY
In the current economy, more and more companies are downsizing and having layoffs. Whether you are laid off or fired, losing your job can really feel devastating. One's job, besides providing the money necessary for living, can also give that person their sense of identity and self-confidence. It is common to define yourself by what you do and how well you do it. Therefore, if you lose that job your entire sense of self-worth and who you are in the world can be shaken.Men who feel it is "being a man" to be the provider for the family and be successful in their work often experience terrible feelings of shame and humiliation when they lose a job. Some men feel so embarrassed that they may maintain a charade of going to work to hide their unemployment from their family or friends.
Women, on the other hand, are more able to turn to their role as wife and mother for their sense of self-worth. The problem for women is that their family and peers may not understand the terrible loss and sense of failure for her because they expect them to beperfectly happy with the wife/mother role alone. Unemployment can be terribly difficult for a couple to deal with, as each partner may have their own reaction to their spouses' loss of work. These include fears about the families financial security, feelings about how this makes them view their partner and effect this will have on their children. Sometimes the person who lost their job is so ashamed they may push their partner away leaving them feeling helpless and alone.
There is a huge connection between the economy and mental health. Money is one of the biggest stressors. Losing your job and being unable to make ends meet leaves people anxious and can even lead to depression. You may remember during The Great Depression, bankers jumped from windows and ended their lives over the panic and shame they felt from being financially ruined. I am seeing marriages flounder under the stress of the current recession. Angry and scared couples fight more and look to the other to fix things... When people can't, there is disappointment and frustration. Less money equals more money fights. Shame makes people turn away from friends and family who would normally be their support, and hence they are alone while feeling terrible. People who had mental health issues to begin with and were therefore at greater risk for depression now feel they can't afford to seek treatment, and so they get worse.
There is a huge connection between the economy and mental health. Money is one of the biggest stressors. Losing your job and being unable to make ends meet leaves people anxious and can even lead to depression. You may remember during The Great Depression, bankers jumped from windows and ended their lives over the panic and shame they felt from being financially ruined. I am seeing marriages flounder under the stress of the current recession. Angry and scared couples fight more and look to the other to fix things... When people can't, there is disappointment and frustration. Less money equals more money fights. Shame makes people turn away from friends and family who would normally be their support, and hence they are alone while feeling terrible. People who had mental health issues to begin with and were therefore at greater risk for depression now feel they can't afford to seek treatment, and so they get worse.
It is the sense that you have lost control that drives the worst psychological problems. We have all been raised to believe that if we worked
hard enough and kept plugging away, we could make it. But watching hard-working people unable to pay bills and losing their job tells you that
the old rules no longer apply. In addition to fear, there are the feelings of shame and
humiliation: A grown person should be able to care for his or her family and if they can't... what does that say about me? Children
do, of course, pick up on their parents' feelings and that fear in a
child leads to various anxiety issues like separation anxiety (being
scared to be separated from parents).
What can you do?
How can you help those around you?
Get more information from TODAY at Todayshow.iVillage.com
What can you do?
- Allow yourself to experience the normal response (fear, sadness, anger). Remember: YOU are not your MONEY. Do not over-identify with your financial status as the definition of yourself.
- Avoid self-damaging behavior like self-berating, alcohol and drug use, stepping
outside the marriage, overeating, etc. Get help for real psych
symptoms and exercise to relieve stress and eat and sleep well, too.
- Increase energy. When men are highly stressed or depressed, they often turn to alcohol. Women often turn to food. Sometimes the last thing you want to do when you're distressed is exercise, one of the few things that may be helpful. Out of shame and upset you may isolate yourself and avoid talking to others, again one of the few things that really does help.
- Be flexible in marital roles- if one loses the job, the other may need to be the breadwinner and change who takes care of things at home... The point is, roles are not etched in stone, and being flexible can help psychologically as well as financially.
- Keep a routine. Whether out of work or freaking out, keeping structure in your day helps alot... Keep to a usual routine with healthy outlets built in.
- Share with others who get it... There's nothing like a friend who understands how you feel. let people know you would rather hear from them and talk about it than hide and live in shame. If need be, consider professional help if you are truly overwhelmed.
- Think outside the box in terms of creative solutions for work, finances and changes in lifestyle. You may have always been an accountant, but now is the time to consider what else you could do with your skill set. What business can you start at home? Can you pitch in on joint purchases with neighbors for purchasing in order to save overall? You could come up with a way to make or save money that unlike anything you have ever done before and this can give you a sense of hope, possibility and regaining control.
How can you help those around you?
- Do not hide. Others take their cue from you... If you hide, they will avoid. Let them know you welcome support and conversation.
- Ask for connections. It's six degrees of separation out there... Make use of it. Many people can connect you for work opportunities or share ideas for saving, investing, etc. You can only learn from others if you ask and then listen.
- Be careful not to shun others. You may think you do this to spare them embarrassment, but the ones you shun now will shun you later. Be a sounding board and supporter.
Get more information from TODAY at Todayshow.iVillage.com
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Anything for a story huh?
Recession? technically.... no
High unemployment rate? Here's the record.
http://research.stlouisfed.org/fred2/data/UNRATE.txt
When interviewers ask people how the economy is affecting them, many of the responses raise eyebrows.
Having to stop drinking $5.00 cups of coffee is a hardship? Having to buy store brands is terrible?
Carpooling is tough?
Staying home to vacation when the home is complete with various and sundry electronic toys, swimming pool, air conditioning and big screen TVs is hardly roughing it.
It's too bad that Americans measure their misery by these standards.
Europeans will tell you that they've been paying over $5.00 a gallon for gas for years and citizens of Third World countries would consider even the poorest American's life luxurious living.
It's surprising that journalists who are seeking the obligatory negative quotes to augment their reporting don't see how ridiculous some of those quotes sound.
I don't understand Mike or Kate's response. You both obviously have a good job and a lot of money. Where I live people are not paying $5 for latte's and going on European vacations...they're simply trying to make ends meet. The average Americans are losing their jobs, can't afford to drive a car anymore....can only buy half of the food they used to buy and losing their homes to forclosure. It's tuff out here in the real USA...not all of us are as well off as you both obviously are..It's funny how you usually only hear from the people who don't have hardships, making comments about people who do......if you don't know what you're talking about, kindly keep your comments to your self.
Tonight the CBS News showed how gas prices are affecting lives. A Los Angeles party planner said that people are not scheduling as many extravagant parties. A woman said that she now walks to work and has to make coffee at home. Another woman can no longer go to a spa to have her eyebrows tweezed.
wertwerwerwe
Awwwww, "Can't go to the spa to have her eyebrows tweezed." That's exactly what Mike or Kate is talking about. The things that we think we now "have to do without" were things that we sometimes didn't really need to be doing in the first place. Having to get less groceries, not being able to pay bills, or extra concern about the cost of traveling to work - those are real problems.
How do you survive the stress? Well some people just try to employ their most positive attitude/sense of humor... That is if you can still laugh about it... Here is something funny on gas prices that a friend of mine emailed me - I hope it can put a little smile on your face...
http://www.hahameter.com/HaHa/Content/Details.aspx?rid=121
The average Americans are losing their jobs, can't afford to drive a car anymore....can only buy half of the food they used to buy and losing their homes to forclosure
**********************
tom
Addiction Recovery Connecticut
Well the following is from someone who was just laid off 2 months ago from a well known corporate retail chain, I am single and in my 40's, I have always been good at managing my money and have a credit rating in the 8's which i am very proud of since it took me a while to get there with a lot of dicipline. I am in my last week of severance pay and this weekend I start reporting for unemployment benefits in 2 months I have landed only 1 ineterview and there were about 20 other applicants competing for that same position. My Goal is to find a job before my unemployment expires in 6 months, ideally before christmas. If I dont I may have to dip into my retirement just to pay the rent and my car payment which by the way is a very economical 2001 corolla. Nothing extravagant. I have no family but great friends that tell me I will never go hungry but My heart goes out to those that are struggling like myself but have additional mouths to feed. For all posting here please remember evryone has a story to tell if you just keep an open mind and lend an ear, show some compassion there is always someone worst off than yourself.
I have been unemployed before but this is the first time that I am a bit worried.
There are 4 in my household, my husband, our 2 boys ages 2 and 4 and myself. What I hate the most is when my boys are asking for something to eat and I have to tell them no, because then we won't have enough to last for the week. We've been hit hard on the grocery end of things. We've recently cut back what we can, phone, cable and my 4 year old got into free daycare; my mom watches my 2 year old for free. I wish we could pay her something cause she is on a fixed income and struggling too but we just can't. I worry about the security of my job as a dispatcher; because things are really slow at work. I just started almost 2 months ago but I've been told by fellow employees there have been lay offs before and that worries me. I'm just waiting and wondering if and when things will improve...